Tag Archives: blood pressure

let me be real for a minute

11 Jun

So, I feel guilty for admitting this, but it’s my truth, and so I am going to…

I hate being pregnant.

I do. I really hate it.

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I feel guilty for feeling that way because I feel like I should be so grateful to be pregnant with all the struggles we have had and also knowing so many women who have never been pregnant and would do anything to be in the position I am in. But, I just can’t make myself feel that way right now.

Right now, I am frustrated. It’s been a super annoying week and I am just ready for September to be here so I can start holding and loving on this baby girl instead of all this stupid pregnancy stuff.

On Monday, I had a checkup with my ob mostly to go over what had been discussed with the specialist. I felt completely calm going to the appointment because I already knew all the results.

They took my bp and it was somewhere around 150/90. We heard her heartbeat right away and it was 148 so that was great. He also asked me about my weight loss. He said he’s not concerned at this point, but doesn’t want me to lose anymore.

He sent me home with a kit to do a 24 hour urine collection to check for preeclampsia and a prescription to go get a blood pressure cuff and check it two times a day.  He also gave me orders to do my glucose test at the end of June to check for gestational diabetes.

I checked my blood pressure at home that night for the first time and it wasn’t good. It was 145/102. I realized then that I never asked him if I should contact their office if it got to a certain number. I decided it was probably ok at this point because the top number wasn’t too bad.

Tuesday, I had somewhere to be in the evening so I decided to do my urine collection on Wednesday instead. My bp got slightly higher every time I checked it, the highest on Tuesday was 153/104.

Wednesday, I hung out at home with my pee jug and relaxed as much as possible. It helped some because my top number was back down to 141 while the bottom number was sticking right around 104.

Thursday, we went to the lab and dropped off my urine and they took blood samples. We then ran a few errands, including buying some shelves and curtains for the nursery. We came home and I supervised while Arturo hung the curtain rod and the shelves in the closet. After doing some organizing in the nursery, I took my bp and it was 153/113. I knew that bottom number was too high, but I had been kind of active before taking it.

I texted my dad to ask him about it. My dad is super calm and level-headed so I knew that I could ask him without getting him too wound up. He said I should call my Dr. They were closed for the day so I told him I would call them in the morning. He said to keep him posted.

So, yesterday morning when I got up I took it and it was 160/116. I called the Dr office right away. My Dr was out so the receptionist said she would page the Dr covering for him. It took almost 2 hours to get a call back from their office. During that time, I checked my bp again and it got as high as 176/127. I was pretty panicked at this point.

That is one of the most annoying parts of having high bp. Being stressed can cause it to go higher. But, seeing a high reading makes me stressed. Ahhh!

So, anyway, a nurse called and said that the Dr wanted me to go straight to labor and delivery at the hospital and she would let them know I was coming.

I got off the phone and broke down crying. Why? Why does this have to be so hard? Not one part of the journey to become parents has been easy. I know that God doesn’t owe me anything, but I can’t help but feel like this is getting a little ridiculous. What is the lesson in all this? What am I supposed to be learning? So far, it’s just frustration.

Luckily, Arturo was off work yesterday so he was able to go with me.

I was at the hospital about 4 hours. They hooked me up to the monitors to listen to her heartbeat, make sure I wasn’t having contractions, and to check my bp every 15 minutes.

Her heartbeat was normal and strong. I wasn’t having any contractions. My bp first read 150/90 and shortly after was down to completely normal. The best reading was 120/70. They took more labs and checked a urine sample again.

I have no way of explaining how my bp could be so high at home for several days in a row and then I go to the hospital and within half an hour it is down to normal readings. A couple times this week I thought maybe the digital cuff was out of whack, but when we checked Arturo’s bp, it was normal. So, no idea. Maybe just listening to her heart and knowing she was ok was enough to calm me down? Or maybe it is the dozens of people that are praying for us.

So far, they don’t think I have preeclampsia so that is great. Seems like gestational hypertension, like I had while pregnant with Angel. With Angel it didn’t start until about 34 weeks though so that is concerning.

They sent me home with instructions to call if the top number gets to 160 or the bottom number gets to 110. No bed rest or other instructions of any kind.

I didn’t take it the rest of the day. I just needed to chill and not think about it.

This morning, it was 157/111. What?!? Why?!? I took it a few hours later and it was 150/101 so I am feeling much better about that number.

I am also down another 2 lbs so a total of 8 pounds less than my pre-pregnancy weight.

I don’t want to go back to the hospital over the weekend. I can feel her moving, so I know she is ok. I just need to try and be calm.

This girl needs to keep cooking and I need to stay healthy so that can happen. I am concerned about her having to be born early if this blood pressure remains a problem, so that is what I really want to avoid. I mean, I hate being pregnant, but I still want to be pregnant until this girl is fully baked!

So, every day, I am continuing to remind myself that I am too blessed to be stressed and I am so thankful for all the support, love, and prayers.

15 weeks to go!

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